Emotional Virtue

Many people ask me, “What is emotional virtue?” They say, “I know what emotions are, and I know what virtue is, but together?” One time I was talking with a young woman, and she said, “I feel like such a mess inside.” As we began to unpack the hurt of past relationships, her lack of confidence, the pressure she puts on herself, the images she felt like she had to compete with… she started to see why she felt that way. I gave a talk one night at Benedictine College called, “Love, Emotions, Taylor Swift, Mental Stalking & Mr. Right” over 300 women came, and I knew I was on to something.

Over the past few years, I have come to realize that both men and women are looking for answers. Many women tell me, “I know what not to do… but what should I do? How do I prepare for Mr. Right?” And men come to me with a puzzled look, “I don’t understand women? What am I doing wrong?” or “I have experienced many of the things you talk about!” In a hook-up culture where everyone seems to just be “texting, talking, or hanging out,” pursuing a relationship can be more than complicated – we need a plan, and lots of virtue.

Emotional virtue is all about realigning our own hearts in hopes of realigning our relationships with one another. Emotions are not bad and shouldn’t be suppressed. Emotions and passions are good and give us zeal and “fire” for life! But if we aren’t in control of our emotions (harnessing them and training them) then they will control us; and when they control us, we are no longer free to love. Emotional virtue, therefore, frees us to truly love with an undivided heart.

Want to learn more? Click here for a 10-minute podcast from Sarah Swafford about Emotional Virtue.

Visit EmotionalVirtue.com.